Do you feel weird when all of your friends lust after beautiful, hot movie stars and you are actually not interested in them?

Of course, you shouldn’t. This can mean you might be demisexual.

Demisexuality is a sexual orientation where someone only feels sexual attraction after developing a strong emotional bond with a person. It’s distinct from asexuality and pansexuality, emphasizing emotional connection over physical appearance.

Someone who is demisexual cannot engage in a sexual relationship without carrying emotional connections toward the other person.

If you are a demisexual, you know that sex is not the most enjoyable activity, but you also value the little romantic things. The statement “Not making love without falling in love”  definitely describes demisexuality!

1. You are not interested in physical attractiveness

In order for a demisexual to find a person physically attractive, first he or she have to form emotional connection towards the other person. They may need some time to know, talk, communicate, share experience with the other person in order to have a sexual urge. Basically, demisexuals are not interested in physical look of a person.

2. You like sex, but cannot think of doing it with anyone

Many people experience sexual drive while watching porn, seeing half-naked or completely naked person , or a muscular person.  When your friends talk about a ‘hot’ celebrity this doesn’t mean much on you. Demisexuals are only interested in having sex with the person they got to know and spent time with. They are not interested in pornography or hot, naked person.

3. First date is the most important for you

“First I want to know you, then I want to know if I like you, then I want to love you.”

Demisexuals focus on many things on the first date. They have to thoroughly  get to know the other person in order to be able to think whether they should keep meeting them or not. If you are a demisexual, you probably like to talk about deep topics on the first date in order to understand the other person’s personality. No matter how hot he or she will look like on the first date, you have to ask your questions that  reveal their personality, hobbies, ideas etc.

4. Your friendship turns out to be relationship

Trust and security are the most valuable thing for you, and this is why usually friendships turn out to be relationship for demisexuals. It is easier for them to be attracted to someone they have spent long time with, know details about their lives, how they feel about things, what are their world views etc.

5. You are attracted to similarity.

“Demisexuality  is an attraction style”

Demisexuals are selectively sexual . After spending enough time with the person, they find them attractive as long as you share similar world views, beliefs, hobbies and personality characteristics.

6. Demisexuality is not learned, they are born with it.

Demisexuality is not something that is acquired afterwards, but it exists since childhood. The most observable proof for this is in the adolescence period, where normally most of the teenagers are attracted in a physical outlook of the other people, they have celebrity crushes, or can have sexual fantasies with anyone. Demisexuals, however, even if there is a high peer pressure present, they are not interested in such things. In this period, instead of involving sexual fantasies with their crush, demisexuals involve fantasies such as having long walks, talking and laughing with the object of interest. And they usually have been considered as weird from their surroundings, but actually it is the most valid attraction style.

Please keep in mind that demisexuality is not the same as pansexuality or asexuality. It is something different; and to be demisexual is not a problem or a disease, but it is a choice! 

Images: Pexels [1], [2], [3], [4]

Copyright : Dream Humanity